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Why are These Games Not on Vita?

ftl-vita
Written by Chris Lock

A long while ago I wrote about PSP games that, for one reason or another, are unavailable on the Playstation Store. That was an article full of factual information and appropriate research. This article will have neither. This article is my fanboy dreams and hopes against hopes. If you have a game that you want to see on Vita as well, regardless of the actually possibility of its existence, leave it in the comments.

I adore my Vita. Short of Pokemon, it has every single thing I want in a handheld system. Touchscreen, buttons, thumbsticks, and enough internal hardware to apparently run Borderlands 2. So why is it then that the system is missing such obvious gaming additions? Like what, you say? Well like…

Don’t Starve

Dont-Starve-Shadows

Go ahead and tell me that I can play Don’t Starve on my Vita via my PS4. I can eat delicious pasta through my nose too, that does not mean I want to. Don’t Starve is an amazing game that can have you hooked for hours until you are suddenly mauled by shadow beings and your 93 day run comes screaming to an end. That kind of loss is hard to deal with and is the same reason I find it difficult to enjoy Dark Souls on a console. An easy way to take away that feeling of ‘wasting time’ is to give you the ability to play it anywhere, anytime. On the john? Don’t Starve. Visiting Aunt Sue? Don’t Starve. At the hospital getting pasta removed from your nose? You get the idea.

Dark Souls/ Demon’s Souls

keep-calm-and-praise-the-sunTake the last paragraph, add in a joke about praising the sun, and you have my argument for Dark Souls on the Vita. Although a new title is probably in order, I am thinking “Dark Souls: Prepare to Never Play Another Game Ever Edition”

Minecraft

This game is on its way but needs to be here faster. I really can not fathom why this was not a day one title. I have already spent hundreds of hours in the iOS version and I can imagine hundreds more being sunk in when I have proper controls.

Super Hexagon

This game was recently on Steam for $.30. What does that have to do with it being on Vita? Nothing, I just thought it was interesting. Another interesting thing is that, thanks to the Little Big Planet community, you can play Super Hexagon on your PS3 right this instant.

Those of you with a Vita know how loud it can become. Those of you who have played Super Hexagon know how important the bumping beats are to the game. Those who want this game as a Playstation Plus freebie can sign my online petition. Those who understand how effective online petitions are did not click that link.

FTL (Faster Than Light)

ftl-battle

FTL is entering its second year on the market and it still is not gracing my Vita? The game is receiving an iOS port, and upgrade, in the near future, which is probably a smart move financially for them. But when have indie games ever been about the money, man?! Stop working for the man Subset Games! You do not need money to eat or cloth your children with, not nearly as much as we all need FTL on Vita. Not nearly as much as Sony needs FTL on Vita anyway.

Scott Pilgrim Vs the World: The Game

scott-pilgrim-first-levelThis and King Kong are games of an extremely rare breed – movie based games that are not rancid toddler slobber. The RPG aspects of Scott Pilgrim heavily encourage you to play levels over and over grinding for XP and coins; what kind of system lends itself well to that kind of grinding? Any one that lets you play while sitting on the john. There has been a bit of DLC for the game as well, including an online mode, that could be wrapped into a “Deluxe Edition” and given the Platinum Trophy treatment is so sorely deserves.

Castle Crashers

My thought is that if I start the request ball rolling for this game now, we should get it around the time Duke Nukem Forever 2 is released. This game would feel right at home on the Vita for the same basic reasons that Scott Pilgrim would; RPG, level repetition, etc. Not to mention that the game is still quite fun, even several years after its initial release.

XCOM: Enemy Unknown/ Enemy Within

File under: Life Destroying. XCOM has already seen an iOS release, so why not a Vita one as well. No really, who at 2K said “You know what, let’s ignore the system made for RPGs and Roguelikes and put our game next to Angry Birds.” Sure, money probably had something to do with it but I would rather believe that 2K just secretly hates anyone with a Vita. How else can you explain the lack of news on Bioshock Vita?

Bioshock Vita

ken-levine-dogeSeriously, bro?

Pac-Man Championship Edition DX

If you have not played this game (what is wrong with you) you may not understand why a Pac-Man game is one here. If you have played it, you know exactly why it is here. Imagine Pac-Man except Neon, filled with crazy music, fifty times faster and with hundreds of ghosts. Now instead of listening to Aunt Sue talk about how games rot your brains you can ignore her and rot your brains right in front of her. Screw you Aunt Sue.

Teleglitch

Teleglitch_MonstersSome of the indie gamers may recognize this name immediately. For those that do not, Teleglitch is a top-down Roguelike set within a facility where somebody botched a teleportation experiment. That botch caused the facility to morph into a strange layout and the denizens to change into hideous monsters. The two hooks this game touts are an extreme scarcity of resources forcing you to take your shots wisely, or to even flat out run. The other hook is the way shadows and walls are represented. When a door shuts you are cut off and can no longer see into that room, you can not see around corners, and the pixel based monstrosities can hide in the smallest shadow. Even with the pixel graphics and lack of pre-programmed jump scares, this game can be stress inducing and outright frightening at times. You can read our review, or you want to try out Teleglitch for yourself there is a demo freely available here – Teleglitch Demo.

A while back I reached out to the developers asking about a Vita port and Johann Tael responded with – “Currently we have no plans to support anything but PC, Mac and Linux.” Which all but kills my hope for this entry, but not my dreams.

Have a game you want on Vita? Think some of these choices are bogus? Know exactly why any game is not on Vita? Let us know in the comments.

About the author

Chris Lock

Just a guy that loves games and wants so badly to tell you about them. I have a habit of being a terrible person. Prone to talk about the worst games imaginable. Poke-fan. LBP admirer. RPG lover. Writer. Podcaster. Father. Husband. Student. Tired. @Snickelsox on twitter.

2 Comments

  • I love Don’t Starve on my Vita through remote play but it does have its issues. It would be amazing to be able to bring it with me anywhere I go and not have to worry about Wifi/if other people are using the PS4.

    Also I would die for Borderlands 2 Vita to come out in the first half of 2014.

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